I've been feeling insanely overwhelmed lately. It has been driving me crazy. School is killing me, and I'm just struggling to survive until December 16 (the last day of the semester). Thanksgiving break cannot get here quick enough. I need some time to breathe. I feel like I'm being suffocated all the time. It's not just school that's smothering me though. I feel like I'm once again at a crossroads in my life and it's time for me to reevaluate some things. I'm trying to look seriously at my future. Which university I want to go to, what I really want to major in. I'm trying to figure out where I want to live, and who I want to live with. A big part of me is ready to be on my own.
I used to hate being alone, and I always wanted to be with someone. Now I catch myself craving time alone. Room to be myself, and make my own mistakes. Just space to have fun, and be free. I desperately need some freedom. I'm rapidly approaching my 20th birthday, and what do I have to show for the past two decades? Nothing. I want to do something big. Make a name for myself. Be by myself. I love the people around me, but sometimes it's all just too much. I would absolutely consider myself a free spirit, and I've been feeling caged lately. I just have to figure out my escape plan. I want to make a clean break. Something that wont hurt me, or anyone else. I just hope that's possible.
I'm young, and still just trying to figure things out. I don't know what or who I need at this point. I think that's a big part of my problem. I've lost sight of who I really am. I need to be with myself, and have no distractions. I all the time think I have things figured out, but it always ends up blowing up in my face. I'm a highly intuitive person, and my intuition is telling me that the ways things are right now, aren't how they should be. I hope I can figure out what I need to do before I dig myself deeper into this rut I'm in.
Question: What's the best way to reconnect with your lost self?
Lindsey. Twenty-Five. Currently pursuing a degree in Professional Writing & Film Studies.