I had always thought I was a pretty staunch believer in Karma. If you put good out into the universe, good will come back to you. Events that have transpired lately really make me question my belief in Karma and a slew of other things. At the rate my life has been going lately, I'm starting to think it's true that nice guys (and girls) finish last.
Think about it. It's not the drug dealer struggling to make a living, it's the working mom trying to feed her kids. The student with rich parents, who coasts through life because they have money to fall back on, isn't worried about finding their way into college. The student from a low income family, who works hard in school, is the one who can't afford the university of their dreams. The CEO, who lied and stole his way into wealth, is sleeping fine at night. The honest, ambitious intern is the person struggling to pay their rent. Why does it seem like those who deserve the world bear the weight of it?
I've always heard that you'll never be given challenges you're not strong enough to bear; and the cliche "what doesn't kill you makes you stronger." But sometimes it's tough not to feel like you're dying on the inside. There's always a great rags to riches story out there. What happens to those who work tirelessly to escape those rags but still end up being buried in them? What separates the winners from the losers?
Are some people destined to suffer with no reward at all? I know many people will interject with "the reward comes in the afterlife." If the afterlife is so fantastic, why do we have an earthly life at all? Sometimes it would be nice for our good deeds to simply seem acknowledged, not even rewarded. The daily onslaught of merciless blows to our wallets, bodies, heads and hearts are sometimes too much to handle.
I guess what I'm searching for is a release. Furthermore, it would be great if this release didn't have to come in the form of death. I don't want to believe that we are all simply pawns in this cosmic game between good and evil. My goal is not to become a King or Queen in that game; I just wish the pawns weren't sacrificed so easily. I believe the hardworkers, the honest individuals, the dreamers and so-on deserve a chance at some glory. Glory that wasn't inherited or the result of a lucky break. Simply, glory that was earned.
Lindsey. Twenty-Five. Currently pursuing a degree in Professional Writing & Film Studies.